1. If I can’t tell if it’s funny, but sounds funny, there’s a 98% chance someone else will find it funny.
2. Writing is not the hardest thing in the world. SITTING DOWN to write way harder.
3. Good ideas are like girlfriends: you’re excited when you two first meet; over time you find out that not everything is perfect; if it’s not meant to work out, you can always look it up again one night at 3:00 in the morning.
5. Don’t worry; Chaplin didn’t even know what he was doing until he was 36.
6. If you’re spending all day writing comedy, watch a drama at night, or go to an art gallery. It helps balance you out.
7. It is possible to take a joke and beat a dead horse. Especially when you’re trying to be some intellectual schmuck who writes a scene where Jackie Gleason is beating a dead horse.
8. If you’re tired and still trying to write, you’re not helping yourself. Very few people can write anything decent while exhausted. That is, unless you are Chaplin.
9. If you’re too tired from writing to get laid, you’re working too much.
10. Tell a story. Don’t worry about the jokes. Figure out the story you’re trying to tell, and then lose sleep over the comedy.