I’m extremely annoyed to find that two shirts I bought a few weeks ago do not fit me. It’s either that, or their cut is a bit too snug for my liking. This, my friends, is the epitome of New York City fashion.
You see, I bought two shirts that look like this:
In New York City, you dress for the job you want, not the job you have. It’s a perception thing. So, by that principle, these two shirts should make me look something like this:
Instead though – thanks to this completely fucked-up form of physics and body image – these ill-fitting shirts actually make me look like this:
At $25.99 a pop, I think you can understand my dilemma.